Meet the Match-Makers to the Dumpster Divers: The 10 Most Crushing First Date Stories Ever Told.
For many of us, our first date can be an exhilarating experience that leaves us on cloud nine. But not everyone is as fortunate. From a bird's untimely demise to an unfortunate case of gastronomic sabotage, these 10 individuals have experienced the full gamut of dating disasters.
Take Cristine, for instance, who had just moved to San Diego after her divorce and was asked out by a coworker on a whim. The date went terribly awry when her date's partial denture flew out of his mouth and landed perfectly in her spaghetti. Not only did she never agree to another lunch date with him, but he was transferred out of the office soon after.
Then there's David, who met his match on a bike ride through San Francisco. As they descended the hill, a truck came speeding towards them, and all four wheels landed squarely on David's legs and midsection. Miraculously, he sustained only minor injuries, but the date ended abruptly nonetheless.
It seems that sometimes, no matter how well things start, fate can intervene in an instant. Take Allison, who had been chatting with a man for weeks and decided to meet up for coffee despite being on crutches after surgery. Her date suggested a "fun" surprise hike, which left her tumbling onto the pavement.
Meanwhile, John had a simple trip to a restaurant turn into a catastrophe when he took an ill-fated traffic turn in Wichita. His date freaked out and told him to take her home, and poor John was left wondering why his navigation skills were so off.
We've all heard of awkward first impressions, but what about boxers? Jennifer had agreed to meet a man for coffee at a cafe in Maryland where the AC was broken, only to be greeted by a man wearing white boxer shorts. It seemed like a cruel joke, and she made it clear that their date was over.
In an attempt to divine his feelings, Louisa's date hired an Etsy witch to cast a spell on her, but it turned out to be a costly endeavor for the would-be suitor. When he finally realized that the spirit world wasn't on his side, he wisely decided not to pursue things further.
For some, their dating profile has become a permanent fixture in their ex's life story – and not always in the best light. Aliyaa met her match on a matrimonial website and agreed to meet for coffee despite knowing she was being typecast by her own tongue-in-cheek tagline.
It seems that sometimes, bringing wine to a dinner party full of recovering alcoholics can be a recipe for disaster. Rick's friend set him up with someone who seemed like the perfect match – but on their first date, things took an unexpected turn when they started talking about their experiences in Alcoholics Anonymous.
And finally, there's Kimberly, who had a simple escape plan at her disposal when she realized that her date was rapidly descending into drunkenness. With the rain pouring down outside and few cabs in sight, she knew it was time to make her exit – and boy, did she ever have a story to tell about how she got out of that situation alive.
These 10 first dates will leave you shaking your head in dismay, but perhaps they'll also make you appreciate the little things in life – like a functioning denture or a reliable GPS system.
For many of us, our first date can be an exhilarating experience that leaves us on cloud nine. But not everyone is as fortunate. From a bird's untimely demise to an unfortunate case of gastronomic sabotage, these 10 individuals have experienced the full gamut of dating disasters.
Take Cristine, for instance, who had just moved to San Diego after her divorce and was asked out by a coworker on a whim. The date went terribly awry when her date's partial denture flew out of his mouth and landed perfectly in her spaghetti. Not only did she never agree to another lunch date with him, but he was transferred out of the office soon after.
Then there's David, who met his match on a bike ride through San Francisco. As they descended the hill, a truck came speeding towards them, and all four wheels landed squarely on David's legs and midsection. Miraculously, he sustained only minor injuries, but the date ended abruptly nonetheless.
It seems that sometimes, no matter how well things start, fate can intervene in an instant. Take Allison, who had been chatting with a man for weeks and decided to meet up for coffee despite being on crutches after surgery. Her date suggested a "fun" surprise hike, which left her tumbling onto the pavement.
Meanwhile, John had a simple trip to a restaurant turn into a catastrophe when he took an ill-fated traffic turn in Wichita. His date freaked out and told him to take her home, and poor John was left wondering why his navigation skills were so off.
We've all heard of awkward first impressions, but what about boxers? Jennifer had agreed to meet a man for coffee at a cafe in Maryland where the AC was broken, only to be greeted by a man wearing white boxer shorts. It seemed like a cruel joke, and she made it clear that their date was over.
In an attempt to divine his feelings, Louisa's date hired an Etsy witch to cast a spell on her, but it turned out to be a costly endeavor for the would-be suitor. When he finally realized that the spirit world wasn't on his side, he wisely decided not to pursue things further.
For some, their dating profile has become a permanent fixture in their ex's life story – and not always in the best light. Aliyaa met her match on a matrimonial website and agreed to meet for coffee despite knowing she was being typecast by her own tongue-in-cheek tagline.
It seems that sometimes, bringing wine to a dinner party full of recovering alcoholics can be a recipe for disaster. Rick's friend set him up with someone who seemed like the perfect match – but on their first date, things took an unexpected turn when they started talking about their experiences in Alcoholics Anonymous.
And finally, there's Kimberly, who had a simple escape plan at her disposal when she realized that her date was rapidly descending into drunkenness. With the rain pouring down outside and few cabs in sight, she knew it was time to make her exit – and boy, did she ever have a story to tell about how she got out of that situation alive.
These 10 first dates will leave you shaking your head in dismay, but perhaps they'll also make you appreciate the little things in life – like a functioning denture or a reliable GPS system.
i mean who gets a partial denture flying out of their mouth on a date? and can we talk about how ridiculous it is to hire an Etsy witch to cast a spell on someone just to see if they're into you lol 
that's some next level weirdness. but seriously though, dating can be pretty unpredictable, right? sometimes things go awry and all we can do is laugh at the absurdity of it all 
cristine's partial denture incident is literally the worst i wouldve laughed it off and run away but at least shes safe from that guy 
david's bike crash sounds like a death wish what was he thinking?! 
and jennifer's cafe date turned into a boxer shorts fail 
all these stories make me appreciate my own good luck in finding someone who doesn't drive us crazy 
meanwhile, jennifer was basically served white boxer shorts at a cafe with no AC 
what was she thinking?! and louisa's date trying to hire an etsy witch? 
anyway, i guess you can't win 'em all 
but seriously, how do ppl manage to mess up so badly on their first date? 
and what's with all the weird date ideas? like, who thinks a surprise hike on crutches after surgery is a good idea?!? and omg, an etsy witch casting a spell to figure out if u're compatible? that sounds like something out of a bad rom-com 
anyway, these stories are literally too funny for words 
cristine's spaghetti incident is literally the most gross thing i've ever heard, while david's truck-encounter was a nightmare. and poor john who got lost in wichita? that's just embarrassing 
it just goes to show you can't always control how things go, but being able to laugh at yourself is key 
Poor Cristine!
But hey, at least Kimberly made it out of her date alive and with a great story to tell 
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. I mean, can't we just be honest about what's on our minds? Like with Aliyaa's match, she was basically advertising her 'quirks' to the whole world... not exactly confidence-boosting 
. And what's up with all these wild first dates?! 
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