GlacierGazer
Well-known member
Concerned Dad-to-Be Wonders How Marriage Will Affect His Young Son
A 44-year-old man from the UK, who shares custody with his seven-year-old son and has been in a steady relationship for three years, is worried about how introducing a new partner into their lives will affect his child. The father feels it's better to take this step now rather than later, when his son might feel differently.
His son has already shown signs of confusion regarding the couple's relationship status. A few months ago, he overheard the father talking to his girlfriend on the phone and assumed she was just a friend. Although they didn't discuss it further, the father has since avoided using terms like "girlfriend" around his son.
The father wants to be mindful of his child's feelings but is unsure how to approach the topic without causing any confusion or insecurity. He seeks advice from Lucy Fuller, a UKCP-registered psychotherapist.
Fuller advises that children may not understand the nuances of adult relationships, especially when it comes to terms like "girlfriend" and "partner." She emphasizes the importance of being confident and clear with your child about expectations regarding new partners.
To tackle this issue, the father is advised to take a gentle and approachable approach. He can use everyday activities as a conversation starter and refer back to the time his son thought her was just a friend. The goal is not to create uncertainty but to reassure his child that their love for him hasn't changed with someone else entering the picture.
Ultimately, it's about being mindful of your child's feelings while also being clear and confident in communicating your relationship status and expectations. By approaching this topic with care and sensitivity, you can help your child navigate this new dynamic without any unnecessary confusion or insecurity.
A 44-year-old man from the UK, who shares custody with his seven-year-old son and has been in a steady relationship for three years, is worried about how introducing a new partner into their lives will affect his child. The father feels it's better to take this step now rather than later, when his son might feel differently.
His son has already shown signs of confusion regarding the couple's relationship status. A few months ago, he overheard the father talking to his girlfriend on the phone and assumed she was just a friend. Although they didn't discuss it further, the father has since avoided using terms like "girlfriend" around his son.
The father wants to be mindful of his child's feelings but is unsure how to approach the topic without causing any confusion or insecurity. He seeks advice from Lucy Fuller, a UKCP-registered psychotherapist.
Fuller advises that children may not understand the nuances of adult relationships, especially when it comes to terms like "girlfriend" and "partner." She emphasizes the importance of being confident and clear with your child about expectations regarding new partners.
To tackle this issue, the father is advised to take a gentle and approachable approach. He can use everyday activities as a conversation starter and refer back to the time his son thought her was just a friend. The goal is not to create uncertainty but to reassure his child that their love for him hasn't changed with someone else entering the picture.
Ultimately, it's about being mindful of your child's feelings while also being clear and confident in communicating your relationship status and expectations. By approaching this topic with care and sensitivity, you can help your child navigate this new dynamic without any unnecessary confusion or insecurity.
... they just did what everyone else did, no questions asked. Nowadays it's like everything is so complicated 
. This dad-to-be is worried about how his son will feel when he gets a new partner, but honestly, kids are resilient, right? My little cousin has a friend's sibling who lives with their parents, and that kid never seemed to care 
. I guess the key is just being open and honest without putting too much pressure on the kid. My aunt used to say, "be the example you want your child to follow" 
... that always stuck with me. Anyway, I'm sure this dad will figure it out, he's got time to think about it 
.
his son is already dealing with some major emotional crap and he's worried about introducing a new person into their lives? Like what's next gonna be me getting a new partner and having to explain to my own kids that they're not the favorite?! 
It's one thing when you're dating, it's another thing when you actually get engaged or married. Can't just gloss over the fact that he's gonna have to say goodbye to his "just a friend" status with some other woman 
and Lucy Fuller just tells him to be "confident and clear" but does she have any idea how hard that is?! It's not just about saying a few words, it's about explaining the complexities of adult relationships and how they can affect children. I feel like he's already messing this up by thinking about introducing someone new too soon 
. can't blame the dad for wanting to address it, but hope he doesn't overthink it too much 
. probably just needs to chill and have an open convo with his son 
.
He'll be all alone. And what's the point of getting all clear and confident about it, it's not like it's gonna make a difference in the grand scheme of things...
I feel like we're still living in a time where people are worried about how to introduce their new partner into the family dynamics without messing up their kid's feelings 
. Like, can't we just have open and honest conversations with our children? They're not little kids anymore, they're 7-year-olds who should be able to understand that just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean your love for them changes 
. And honestly, I wish more parents would be having these kinds of conversations instead of tiptoeing around it 
.
. But hey, I guess it's all part of growing up and figuring out who you are... or in this case, who your partner is 
.
But seriously, it makes sense that he wants to ease into it so his kid doesn't feel confused or left out... I mean, its not easy for kids 2 navigate adult stuff, especially when it comes 2 people we love. 
The therapist's advice is solid too, takin it slow & bein clear about expectations is def the way 2 go! 
and it's honestly so stressful for them as a parent! But Lucy Fuller's advice makes total sense 
. I'm sending lots of positive vibes to this dad-to-be for navigating this situation! 
. He should take Lucy Fuller's advice and have an open conversation with his son about how their love hasn't changed 
. I think he'll get there, it's all about finding that balance between being mindful of his child's feelings and being a positive role model 
. The key here is to be open and honest with your kid, without making them feel like they're losing you or anyone else 
. It's not about creating uncertainty but about reassuring your child that their love for them hasn't changed 
. Fingers crossed everything works out smoothly for this lovely family! 