Polyamory, Regrets, Revenge: Shifting the Narrative on Infidelity
Lily Allen's latest album West End Girl delves into the complexities of infidelity and its aftermath, drawing parallels to her own tumultuous relationship with actor David Harbour. But as fans scrutinized every detail of their supposed polyamorous affair, it sparked a broader conversation about the nature of cheating and betrayal.
Allen's album serves as a catalyst for a long-standing story – one that has been told and retold in various forms of media. From Homer's Odyssey to contemporary novels like Emily Adrian's Seduction Theory and Sarah Manguso's Liars, infidelity remains a universal theme. Yet, each iteration offers a unique perspective on the human experience.
One notable example is Andrew Miller's Booker-shortlisted The Land in Winter, which captures the tone and texture of 1960s England. The novel explores an affair between country doctor Eric and a wealthy woman, Alison, as he grapples with feelings of guilt and pride. This nostalgic portrayal highlights how infidelity has been woven into our collective narrative.
In contrast, Miranda July's All Fours is a perimenopause-fueled exploration of desire and crisis. The narrator's midlife awakening sparks an illicit affair with Davey, but ultimately leads to a surprising twist: she sleeps with her friend of Davey's mother, who shares a dark history with the young man. This unconventional narrative shatters expectations and blurs boundaries.
While some novels – like Liars and The Möbius Book – take a more confrontational approach, tackling infidelity as a source of anger and resentment. Lauren Elkin's Scaffolding, however, adopts a more nuanced tone, exploring desire and relationships through the lens of psychoanalysis. By centering women and presenting their complexities, Elkin's novel offers a refreshingly honest portrayal of love, longing, and fear.
As millennials settle into marriage and polyamory emerges as an idealized solution to monogamy's problems, these novels provide a platform for self-discovery and reevaluation. They humanize the complexities of desire, age, and mortality, revealing that infidelity is not simply a "will they or won't they" scenario but a multifaceted exploration of emotions and relationships.
Ultimately, the enduring appeal of these novels lies in their ability to capture our collective longing for connection, understanding, and self-discovery. As one character remarks in Scaffolding, "The most interesting part of infidelity isn't will they or won't they – it's everything else around it."
Lily Allen's latest album West End Girl delves into the complexities of infidelity and its aftermath, drawing parallels to her own tumultuous relationship with actor David Harbour. But as fans scrutinized every detail of their supposed polyamorous affair, it sparked a broader conversation about the nature of cheating and betrayal.
Allen's album serves as a catalyst for a long-standing story – one that has been told and retold in various forms of media. From Homer's Odyssey to contemporary novels like Emily Adrian's Seduction Theory and Sarah Manguso's Liars, infidelity remains a universal theme. Yet, each iteration offers a unique perspective on the human experience.
One notable example is Andrew Miller's Booker-shortlisted The Land in Winter, which captures the tone and texture of 1960s England. The novel explores an affair between country doctor Eric and a wealthy woman, Alison, as he grapples with feelings of guilt and pride. This nostalgic portrayal highlights how infidelity has been woven into our collective narrative.
In contrast, Miranda July's All Fours is a perimenopause-fueled exploration of desire and crisis. The narrator's midlife awakening sparks an illicit affair with Davey, but ultimately leads to a surprising twist: she sleeps with her friend of Davey's mother, who shares a dark history with the young man. This unconventional narrative shatters expectations and blurs boundaries.
While some novels – like Liars and The Möbius Book – take a more confrontational approach, tackling infidelity as a source of anger and resentment. Lauren Elkin's Scaffolding, however, adopts a more nuanced tone, exploring desire and relationships through the lens of psychoanalysis. By centering women and presenting their complexities, Elkin's novel offers a refreshingly honest portrayal of love, longing, and fear.
As millennials settle into marriage and polyamory emerges as an idealized solution to monogamy's problems, these novels provide a platform for self-discovery and reevaluation. They humanize the complexities of desire, age, and mortality, revealing that infidelity is not simply a "will they or won't they" scenario but a multifaceted exploration of emotions and relationships.
Ultimately, the enduring appeal of these novels lies in their ability to capture our collective longing for connection, understanding, and self-discovery. As one character remarks in Scaffolding, "The most interesting part of infidelity isn't will they or won't they – it's everything else around it."
so i was thinking about this article and how it talks about polyamory and infidelity... 
it seems to me that we've been conditioned to believe that monogamy is the only way, but what if we're just as fascinated by the complexities of other relationships? 
Polyamory might be the new monogamy, but let's not forget that human relationships are messy and complicated. I'm so over the 'innocent' polyamorous facade 
. Can we please have some realistic portrayals of desire, fear, and vulnerability in these stories? It's time to move beyond the 'soulmates' narrative 
.
They're not just about the cheating part, but about how people navigate emotions and relationships 
It's so refreshing to see women's stories centered in books like Scaffolding 
and All Fours 
It's not just about the thrill of a new relationship, but about the complexities of human connection 
Polyamory might be an idealized solution to monogamy's problems for some, but these novels show that infidelity is so much more than that 
#Polyamory #InfidelityNarratives #NovelsForTheSoul
. I think we need to focus on building healthier communication skills and working through our issues rather than opting for some flashy, unconventional arrangement 
But what's also cool is that they're not shying away from the darker stuff either. It's all about nuance and understanding.
meanwhile, back in the real world, people are still struggling with basic monogamy and jealousy 
but honestly, i think these new novels that are all about polyamory and infidelity are kinda refreshing? like, they're not just romanticizing it or making it sound super cool – they're actually exploring the complexities and emotions that come with it 
? i mean, we're all over here bashing each other for being cheaters, but really we should be having more nuanced conversations about why people cheat and what it says about us as a society.
. also, lauren elkin's scaffolding is such a breath of fresh air - her take on psychoanalysis and relationships is so insightful 
what i think is really important here is that we're not just talking about cheating or infidelity, but all the emotions and desires that come with it... like, how do we even process all these feelings? 
.
but sometimes regret can be a major buzzkill 
my fave part of the latest album is how lily allen doesn't shy away from her feelings 
and honestly i think we should focus more on self-love 
.
.
who needs 3 ppl when u can just chill with ur bestie and enjoy the benefits without all the drama? imo polyamory gets a bad rep bc people r always projecting their own messed up experiences onto others. newsflash: not everyone is wired to handle multiple relationships at once.
. But what I think is interesting is how these novels are humanizing it and making us see that infidelity isn't just about the 'cheater' or the 'betrayed one' but about the complexities of our own desires and emotions